a) spending time in an airport, the unofficial Elks Lodge of stupid people, whose inabilities to follow simple instructions and work within the respectful codes of society are fascinating
b) surfing the website of Steiner Sports, where baseball "collectibles" are priced at such astoundingly high figures, you'd think they were working directly with the Yankees (oh wait, they are)

While Steiner Sports is still working out the kinks in that "clubhouse air" idea, it does have a host of signs from the old Yankee Stadium that trigger less a feeling of nostalgia than nausea.

Take, for instance, this sign that reads, "CREDIT CARDS ARE NOW ACCEPTED AT ALL PERMANENT CONCESSION & MERCHANDISE LOCATIONS." How much would you pay for a piece of metal that has no more to do with baseball history than a light fixure in a Yankee Stadium broom closet? Try $200.

Yeah, I remember when my pop and I were swiping credit cards while Reggie was blasting homers. What great memories.

My favorite sign, however, is this one that advertisers Steiner Sports itself. Yep, the company cares so much about this "piece of history" that — instead of keeping the sign for its own offices — it's willing to offer it to you in a "once-in-a-lifetime" deal for $750.

That's almost four times the cost of the credit card sign, so you know it's a very sought-after collectible, sure to retain its value for decades.

Happy buying!

Tonight I wrap up my photojournalism class at The New School. Throughout the semester, I've been posting my assignments here, and now I can show you the nine photos that make up my final project: Yankee Stadium.

While they may not be works of art, I had a fun time getting more practice at telling stories through photographs. And in this case, not just one or two shots, but an entire essay.

Yankee Stadium is a complex place. It's majestic and modern, a throwback to history, a cathedral of commerce, a technical marvel, and (at times) an absurdity. I hope some of that comes through in the shots.

The game started at approximately 1:05 p.m.

These photos (and this seating/pricing chart, which doesn't even reveal the starting-at-$500 price tag for Legends Suite seats) indicate what types of "fans" the Stadium was really built for, how far below expectation the Yankees are receiving corporate dollars, and how wasteful corporations behaved in the past in order to set those levels of expectation.

When Yogi Berra said, "Nobody goes there no more; it's too crowded," we know he wasn't talking about the best seats in Yankee Stadium.

I always knew that Don Mattingly was out on the left coast, sporting an alien uniform of some sort, perhaps dining on sprouts between innings. Considering I'd rather read the phone book than sit through a late-night National League baseball game, the concept of the Greatest Living Ballplayer dressed in anything but Yankees pinstripes was out of sight and out of mind.

That is, until I searched eBay for Mattingly jerseys and came up with this auction for a Dodgers No. 8 Mattingly jersey.

All I can think is "This can't be happening!" and "Make it stop!" (Mirroring the emotions of Levi Johnston at Palin family dinners.)

On one hand, fans want to lose themselves in what is, in essence, an unscripted super hero movie. We identify the good guys and root like hell for them, as if the future of the world depended on the outcome.

On the other hand, we don't want our voluntarily suspended reality taken for granted and our intelligence insulted. In other words, we may play dumb, but don't treat us like we're stupid.

Which bring us to Alex Rodriguez, who spoke before the media Tuesday and came out looking no better than the cheating, lying, other-planetary media klutz he was before.

And THAT, ladies and gentlemen, is the face of our Yankees franchise in 2009. Believe it.

Derek Jeter, Mariano Rivera, Andy Pettitte and Jorge Posada? Old news. And, according to Jeff Pearlman, "dolts" who did themselves a disservice by blindly supporting A-Rod, when his actions to this point have countered anyone worthy of such backing.

Among those unimpressed with A-Rod are Jon Heyman, Jayson Stark, Mark Feinsand, Steve Lombardi and even general manager Brian Cashman. Among those convinced that Rodriguez purged demons with 100% candor and honesty ... uh, I'll get back to you with those.

A-Rod's march toward Barry Bonds' career home run mark was supposed to be a feel-good story, a chance for the Yankees' p.r. machine to make good on the staggering 10-year, $275 million contract they signed Rodriguez to in 2007. Alas, they bought a lemon, and A-Rod's journey will be no more wholesome and no less awkward than Bonds'.

So that's who we've got. Barry Bonds in pinstripes. Yay.

When A-Rod steps to the plate in the new Yankee Stadium, I hope fans extend to him a clear sign that we're offering him a second chance and a clean slate.

With dead, perfect silence.

In order to improve my skills in street photography, I enrolled in a 15-week photojournalism class at The New School.

I've posted some of my work from the first couple of assignments, and I'll continue to do so through the final project.

As an exhilarating inauguration day winds down and people bid $20 on eBay for tomorrow's New York Times, I decided to have a little fun and see what the bitter (but more patriotic, of course) readers of FOXNews.com had to say about perhaps the most jubilant day I have ever seen in America.

Comment by Woo-Hooo
"I just quick my job and I'm going on WELFARE!!! I'm gonna be set for at least four years! You all better get on the gravvy train now before it gets too full! Yes, sir, welfare's gonna get an 8% increase! You all better hurry!"

Comment by sherry
"he must be embarassed of being bi-racial...or Michelle won't let him be what he is..."

Comment by Bill
"Time to Secede!!! DEO VINDICE!"

Comment by Steve
"Jimmy Carter must be thrilled!! There is now someone in office that will make him look good. Socialism is IN! Captialism is OUT! Freedoms are in danger! Why do you thing the gun sellers voted Hussien "The gun salesman of the year"?"

Comment by Bush
"I am going to miss bouncing my nuts off of Michelle's ghetto booty!"

Comment by Tyrel
"Headlines for 2009
Menthol cigarettes worth more than platinum, experts say
Walmart to sell only gold teeth and activator, spokesman say
Chicken selling for $150 a bucket"

Comment by swbytm
"by next winter I will be in florida staking my cardboard hut out and pan handling the blacks because I am a white man"

That should pretty much answer anyone's question of whether MLK's dream has been realized, of if this was just a giant step forward.

Read more racism and general vitriol at the bottom of columns in FOXNews.com's Opinion section.