She charges: Anywhere from nothing if you're her friend (she has a lot of friends in the club industry, and so occasionally she'll appear somewhere for free — she's good like that) to $400K, which is what she's getting paid for her upcoming 21st birthday party this July at Pure in Las Vegas. "It's a two-appearance deal," says our anonymous source. "She'll get paid $200K to appear at Pure on her birthday and another $200K to appear at the same club later that year." Rumor has it she's been shopping her celebration around since last December, with an opening bid of $250K.

Wow.

Wow.

Without all those exposed-cooch shots, who knows how low her going rate would've been?

All I got for my 21st birthday was a Three Wise Men shot (Jose Cuervo, Jack Daniels and Jim Beam in one glass), which I promptly threw up but put me over the top of 21 shots for the night. Total: 22 shots, 8 beers and a gin & tonic. Miracle I'm not dead.

I'll start the bidding on my 35th birthday next February at a cold Natural Light and a couple of Gray's Papaya hot dogs.

Elsewhere: Lohan No. 1 on Maxim Top 100 for 2007.