So I ventured to Comedy Central's website to see what's doing in Yankerville and found that its Crank Yankers website is more robust than ever. Especially concerning the archived videos, where it seems a higher percentage of clips make the cut.

There are a couple of problems with it, though.

First, everything has been moved from their previous homes. Thus, a write-up I did on Elmer's love for Poop Chute Ruth contains several now-dead links. Nobody foolishly abandons referral traffic like official company websites.

Second, the videos are limited to 1:30 minutes in length. Why, I don't know. Someone must've decided that streaming full-length segments would cost Comedy Central untold riches. Someone who probably knows less about the Internet than a seventh-grader.

But the interface works well, and they do have one of my favorite clips in there: "Elmer Lodges a Complaint," when one of Jimmy Kimmel's characters reports a beak found in his bucket of fried chicken. ("You know those things chickens have on their faces ... THAT THEY EAT WITH?!")

Unfortunately, with the clip cut short, you don't get to hear Elmer say, in response to a replacement offer, "I don't want it if it's gonna be all beaky."

(Oh, and the Poop Chute Ruth clip is there, too, in Season 2 Page 3, titled "Elmer Calls a Brothel." So grab your friends, and your brother Charlie, and come down "Saturday night" at 4:30 in the afternoon to make love to some black girls in the poop chute.)

And don't forget to vote Tony Deloge as District Selectman!

Also see:

• Crank Yankers Soundboard — Navigate to Elmer to hear him say, "I just saw somethin' that made me wanna crap!"

• Wikipedia's Crank Yankers Entry — A place to find out which well-known comedians voice each character, plus such tid-bits as the names of Birchum's fallen 'Nam platoon members (Espinoza, McCann, Jackson, Hernandez and Dejacamo).

Today's Web Finds:

• Conversations Spammers Must Think We Have — A humorous take on what must go through the minds of customers who actually fall for spam. Assuming they have minds.

• Ranking: Loss of Natural Teeth By State — In the song "Country Roads," John Denver refers to West Virginia as "almost heaven." Um, not to dentists. (Found on Gorilla Mask.)

• Interview With Ari Gold — HBO.com's interactive feature allows you to interview for a job under the prickly Entourage agent. A job I didn't get after telling him his office smelled like Bigfoot's dick. (Found on Thrillist)

• Tera Patrick on How to Make Homemade Porn — Let's see, from the leaked celebrity sex vids I've seen, you're gonna need: drugs, ass pimples, a washed-up rock star and, of course, a night vision camera.

• Orignal Video of William Hung's American Idol Performance — If for no other reason than it still cracks me up.

• Photoshop: Celebrities as Clowns — Carrot Top's image reminds of food, but I wouldn't look at it after eating. (Found on Umm... Yeah)

• T-Shirt: Your Mom Is in My Top 8 — For the MySpace crowd, especially you people with custom templates that give me seizures. My MySpace page.

• Video: Pink Gets Nipple Pierced — And her mom gets the best seat in the house.

• College Students Found Dead Inside Balloon — Surprisingly, this didn't occur at Harvard.

• Ice Cream Truck Driver Cited for DUI — Like anyone could perform that job sober.