This must come as good news to Tony Massarotti of the Boston Herald, who, last week, lambasted "fake" Red Sux fans, asking them to make like Damon and leave. (My thinking is that a win won't lose bandwagoners.)

Well, I'm here to defend those fake fans, if such a thing even exists.

First, with baseball economics being the way it is, the more fans the better. Someone has to pay for these salaries, and fans are the ones who do it. I guess you can say there are enough "real" Sux fans to sell out such a small park, but the "fake" ones certainly contribute to radio, TV and merchandise income. Income that allows Boston to better compete with the Yankees, who can afford well-documented luxuries precisely because they have the most fans nationwide.

Second, all successful teams have bandwagoners. All of them. The Yankees have seen attendence rise dramatically in the Joe Torre era, this after the Knicks — yes, the Knicks — hosted the events at which to be seen a few years prior. Now the Knicks are laughingstocks, but I promise you, their next championship will be huge around here. It's the one major sports team without split allegiances in New York.

Third, I can't imagine the readership of new fans is hurting the sports section of the Boston Herald. Why bite the hand that feeds you?

Maybe it's uncool, today, to say you got all Sux-crazy in 2004, or even 2003, when there was light at the end of the tunnel. Give it time, and it won't sound so bad.

What's the harm in a Northwesterner saying he was turned on to NBA basketball when Bill Walton dominated for the Blazers in 1977? The 1986 Mutts turned on a whole generation of baseball fans with cheesy mustaches. So what?

Colleges have long since seen applications spike after winning a national title, Villanova's run in 1985 being a famous example. Bobby Bowden and Mike Krzyzewski built decades-long national powers out of pedestrian programs — didn't the new fans and their dedication have something to do with sustaining the success?

If I was a Sux fan — and thank god I'm not, because I don't own the required number of pleated khakis — I would welcome all fans. (Except for the crass boozebags and, again, kudos to the Boston Dirt Dogs for railing against them.) I'm sure the long-time fans lament that tickets are way harder to come by — the secondary market prices for Fenway tickets are unparalleled, and that's not even money that the Red Sux get to pump into payroll.

The solution: knock down that dump and build another. The new Yankee Stadium is supposed to net Steinbrenner an additional $50 million annually. As long as Fenway stands, I'm a much happier fan. Because rich ticket brokers don't pose as much of a threat as rich baseball clubs.