Frankly, I don't know what took so long.

We already have such websites as Rate My Wedgie and WedgieGirls.com, not to mention the home page of Wedgie the Clown (and Magician).

In the Oct. 16, 1991 Seinfeld episode titled "The Library," Jerry and Co. explain the definition of the wedgie:

Elaine: Why do they call it a wedgie?
George: Because the underwear is pulled up from the back and ... it wedges in.
Jerry: They also have an atomic wedgie. Now the goal there is to actually get the waistband on top of the head. Very rare.
Elaine: Boys are sick.
Jerry: Well what do girls do?
Elaine: We just tease someone 'til they develop an eating disorder.

Elsewhere online:
• Buy an atomic wedgie Halloween costume
• Video of massive wedgie prank
• History and types of wedgies

Other News Links:

• Teen Sends Student Semen-Frosted Brownies — Kinda gives "homemade batter" a new meaning, huh? Props to whatever teenage whore detected the secret ingredient after a few people ate them.

• Prof Waxes Lyrical Over The Boss — A SUNY Potsdam professor is offering a political science course titled "Walk Tall: Beauty, Meaning and Politics in the Lyrics of Bruce Springsteen." I'd make fun of it, but I realize four of my college credits came in Skiing and Cooking. (Thanks, Morgan)

• Man Dies After Winning Tequila-Drinking Contest — The "winner," who is no longer eating the worms but vice-versa, drank 50 shots, which is the equivalent of 75 ounces — or more than a six-pack of straight tequila. (Found on Gorilla Mask)

• The Book Stops Here — Wired's lengthy and very interesting feature on Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia that is edited by, well, everyone. Some of whom are addicted, and many of whom have their own battles with pranksters and run-of-the-mill assholes who just don't like to see any well-intentioned project succeed.

• Rewriting Placement History — Warner Bros. Domestic Television Distribution is cutting new deals to graphically insert products into TV sitcom re-runs. (Collective sigh.) I would, however, love to see somebody screw up and see a laptop on Ralph Kramden's kitchen table.

• Timberlake Slammed by Unimpressed O'Jays — I don't think Justin deserves a 100th of the shit he takes (seriously, man, put your resumé against his: accomplishments, money, chicks), but he definitely shouldn't be introducing anyone into the Rock 'n' Roll Hall of Fame. I don't know how he got that gig.

• Top Five Online Scams — There's a lot of crafty, vicious stuff out there, but are you telling me people actually fall for the Nigerian 419 Letter? I really feel bad for those people. They just don't have a chance against the number of dicks out there.