Check this eBay winning bid: $355 for ONE ticket at the other end of Madison Square Garden from the stage.

There are THOUSANDS of better seats in the arena, and this one goes for $355? Manny Ramirez isn't this stupid.

People, let me explain a phenomenon called "getting sick." Every day people come down with an illness. It prevents them from attending concerts and sporting events, theater performances and wet T-shirt contests. You do not buy a single ticket 200 feet from the stage for $355. If this is news to you, bookmark Craig's List right now and check back five hours from showtime.

And to further show how eBay has kicked "location, location, location" in the balls, the seller is offering a ton of other big-ticket concert tickets, from New Jersey to North Carolina, to California and parts in between. eBay gives power to anyone, anywhere to be a ticket broker. I wonder if high school guidance counselors know about this.

Other Web Finds:

• How Well Do You Know the Middle Eastern Map? — A little like the U.S. model, you place the name of the country of top of its outline. I got a -184, because I mistook Whogivesacrapistan for Idontgiveashitistan. (Thanks, Pee Wee)

• eBay Search: "Advertise on My..." — Exactly 250 entries, as of PK.com press time, off people selling off space somewhere on their bodies, their cars, their shirts, their whatever. If only Wilt Chamberlain was alive to sell his dick.

• Euphemisms for Taking a Dump — I know I must've linked to this about 100 times but, if you act now, I'll throw in sayings for diarrhea and farting. Let's play a game: What does it mean to do the Aztec two-step?

• Britney Spears Goes Braless Buying Maternity Wear — She still looks broken, but at least her nipples are hard again. Too bad not as good as when she was in that green shirt with the homies.

• Video: Field Sobriety Test — If you're gonna test male drivers' sobriety, this is the way to do it. The answer is obvious if you think about it.

• 50 Most Loathsome People in America — The Buffalo Beast has a riff on the famous New York Press annuity. The list takes shots at Republicans, Democrats, porn stars, musicians and, yes, you. Maybe the most negative piece of content ever generated.

• Brice Beckham Dot Net — SomethingAwful.com's amusing parody of a blog run by the kid who played Wesley on Mr. Belvedere. Includes a picture of "the time Uecker was in his PCP-addiction phase." We've all had our suspicions over the years.

• Cum-Kleen Personal Wipes — Available in vanilla- or mango-scented. Sales are expected to quadruple when Britney finally does that PLayboy photoshoot.

• The Perception Laboratory's Face Transformer — Upload a pic and see what you'll look like when you're the Pope's age ... or when you've smoked as much as Brigitte Nielsen. (Found on Stephanie Klein's Greek Tragedy)

• PostSecret — A blog that scans in postcards from people sharing such secrets as: "I have the password to my ex-boyfriend's e-mail, and I go in and read and/or erase e-mails. He has no clue!" (Thanks, Emily)

• Do You Have a Type A Personality? — I do, according to this test. Apparently, I have qualities that are supposed to lead to success in athletics and business. What this online quiz does not know is that I also have qualities that lead to raging hangovers, playing guitar and writing ad jingles for a fictional bar named "Dirties," and nary giving a crap about anything business-related. (Found on J-Mo)

• Interesting Facts About Passing Gas — Did you know that at any one time, there is about 200 ml (a mugful) of gas in each person's gut? Did you know that about 500 types of bacteria live in our intestines? Did you know that my friends have slandered me on this site and made up stories of my farting and locking the windows on my car in high school? (Thanks, Rachel)

• eBay Item: Rocky Statue for $1 MIllion — And it's not even a one-of-a-kind. For real. I'm pretty sure that for a cool million I can get something similar sculpted. And on eBay, for god's sakes? Who's surfing around looking to spend $1 million on a likeness of Sylvester Stallone? (Thanks, Shumpy)

• Johnny Carson's Final Tonight Show Monologue — I'm late with this, but I haven't done Web Finds in awhile. Anyway, in 1992, he predicts that Carrot Top will be the next great comedian. Nah, just kidding.

• Interview With a Link Spammer — Anonymous leeches: the lowest form of thieves and cowards. It bothers me more than you'll know that I have to register commenters, all because my site attracts an audience. One day I was hit with many thousands of phony comments, and it got to the point where every day was a crapshoot — either hundreds or merely dozens. (Thanks, Ryan)

• Tara Reid Seeks Man, With Help of Ellen DeGeneres — Ellen's gonna screen videos of men longing to get with the New Jersey-raised party girl. At least someone's gonna find out if the fake left breast is as nasty as the right. (Thanks, Chris)