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Tuesday, September 21, 2004

Thoughts on Avril Lavigne's 'Fuck' Belt Buckle
I got my October 2004 issue of Maxim in the mail Monday and, before I put it in its rightful place next to the toilet, I thumbed through to find this month's gallery of Avril Lavigne pictures. In one shot, she's delivering the double-bird, no doubt fulfilling a fantasy for the teen-aged boys who have always wanted to masturbate to a girl looking like she couldn't be bothered with you.

In some others, she's sporting a large belt buckle that reads, "FUCK."

Avril, born Sept. 27, 1984, will be 20 years old next week. So she's old enough to fuck, but probably also old enough to recognize much of her audience is not, and that's why I'm a little uneasy with her being a walking, obscene billboard.

Now if you think Avril makes all of her own image-making decisions, then you're dumber than Manny Ramirez on two hours' sleep. Which makes this even more unsettling, in my eyes. Her management and Maxim's publishers no doubt endorsed her four-letter accessorizing. Must be part of their master plan for her to seem more "adult."

Ought to make for some good patent-kid conversations, too, when Stacey wants to wear her own FUCK belt buckle to ninth-grade homeroom.

Or maybe I'm just getting too old. But I see this as less genuine rock 'n' roll rebellion and more of a crass image-making stunt.

Other Web Finds:

A New York Escorts Confessions — Alexa intrigues with her tales of working in the world's oldest industry, right here in the Big Apple. And maddens me with her refusal to add a grammatically correct apostrophe in her title. Argh!

Alyssa Milano Photoshoot in FHM — She's like the patron saint of glossy lad mags. I think I might have to drop her to No. 2, behind Stacey Keibler on my all-time list after reading this quote: "If a man has decided to cheat on me and he can keep it from me—and live with himself—then I’m fine maintaining the relationship. But if he’s going to be an idiot and I find out about it, I’m against it!"

Revenge of the Nerds T-Shirts — Tell the world to call you Booger! Also see shirts for Three's Company and The Karate Kid.

1972 E-Mail Casts Doubt on Bush Guard Service — A spoof on the controversy that I haven't even been able to follow the whole way through. I thought Vietnam was over, man.

Cliff's Notes Now Free Online — You can't print or download for free, but you can read. Well, some of you Red Sox fans might not be able to.

How to Eliminate PC GlitchesPC World to the rescue.

Lightness Perception and Lightness Illusions — Time waster alert! A scientific look at some B&W illusions, from those dummies at M.I.T.

Tight Jeans and the Fat Girl — A chunkmonster successfully stuffs what used to be 1,000 McDonald's extra value meals into size 28 jeans.

50 Weirdest Guiness Records — If you're looking to date famous women, note that Christine Martin of Horsham, West Sussex, sat in a bath of maggots for 1hr 30mins in 2002.

Warfalcons Videos — Plenty of not-safe-for-work content here, but you might want to check out a horrifying, live car crash as a TV reporter does a story on a dangerous intersection. Also see a French guy walk into a closed, glass door, a chick falling off the back of her cool boyfriend's motorcycle and a kid getting a boner at a strip show.

Miss Georgia Sex Offenders 2004 Pageant — Sad that so many of their crimes involve kids but, if you don't mind a trip to hell, the commentary is pretty funny.

Category: Web Finds | Permalink | Post a Comment (21)


Comments: Thoughts on Avril Lavigne's 'Fuck' Belt Buckle

Please please please don't ever post links to pictures of fat people again. Now I have to go disinfect my eyes... and drink till I blackout.

Posted by West at September 21, 2004 1:16 AM

Good morning.
I usually get to work for 9:30 AM, which means by 9:40 I'm checking the latest on PK, Gmask and Slampig. I was wondering at what time you post, really late or super early as you Almost always have something new up. Just curious, Thanks.

(Note From Paul: I try to post after midnight Sun.-Thurs., allowing for new content every weekday morning. Sometimes I write during the day and post it after midnight. Mostly I write anywhere from 10 p.m. - 2 a.m.)

Posted by Danny at September 21, 2004 9:45 AM

I thought the same exact thing about Avril when my Maxim arrived, as well. No we are not getting too old. I think that younger artists are trying to be shocking and rebellious, but it is really just pathetic (an in this case sad) instead.

Alyssa Milano is officially insane. Actually, you would be surprised how many women feel the way she does. I work with 4 married women who agree with her. WTF?

That women in the jeans is frightening.

Posted by Cass at September 21, 2004 9:51 AM

Which is why I don't let my early teenaged boys read Maxim. Du'oh. Common sense and some tactical preventive measures- gosh, sounds like being an informed and involved parent, what a novel idea- help keep some of the crap from the boys until they're a little older.

Not that they haven't read their uncle's Playboys, I'm sure, even if he hides the magazine before they come over. I'd much rather they 'read' that than Maxim, that's for damn sure.

You're not getting old. You're just growing up. It happens to the best of us...

Oh, and what about that woman in the maggot bath? Wouldn't the maggots go into areas that....eww, I can't even think it. GROSS. And I'm going to block that tshirt site from the boys' computer- they're already waaaaay too interested in disgusting tshirts (their fav, for which the two oldest are still campaigning for: three stick figures holding sticks, two with a hot dog on the stick and one having the hot dog fallen off into the fire with the caption: It's always fun until someone's weiner gets hurt. Oy. Teenaged boy humor.)- why can't they just want nice tshirts like the paulkatcher.com shirt that arrived in the mail yesterday? Thanks, and I slept in it last night. ;-)

Posted by lucy at September 21, 2004 10:44 AM

Avril Lavigne sporting a "FUCK" belt buckle is nothing near rock-n-roll rebellion. Rock-n-roll rebellion was the Ramones wearing old t-shirts, torn jeans, leather jackets and unkempt haircuts. It drove my parents nuts that I looked like such a slob.

You hit the nail on the head, Paul. This is just crass mass-marketing aimed at the lowest common denominator. Which seems to be sinking lower and lower with each passing month.

Posted by TTman at September 21, 2004 11:50 AM

Avril Lavigne rebellious? I think not. Extending one's middle finger doesn't make you rebellious. A belt buckle doesn't make you rebellious (unless it's says PK.com on it). Hell, releasing a sex tape isn't even rebellious any more.

If she really wanted to be rebellious she would put on 200-250 lbs and take pics of herself trying to sqeeze into a pair of size 28 Bugle Boys while wearing her XXXL Revenge of the Nerds "Ogre" t-shirt. Now THOSE would be the actions of a woman trying to say "Fuck the System".

"Sex, Drugs and Rock & Roll" is not longer the slogan of the unruly. Instead it's a recipe for "sellout" success.

Posted by Nick at September 21, 2004 12:29 PM

Touche, Nick.

Posted by lucy at September 21, 2004 12:39 PM

Since I am in the age range targeted by such marketing, allow me to throw in my 2 cents.

The only people who buy into the pre-packaged rebel bull are the people who think they are alternative by shopping at HotTopic. Wearing a semi-witty shirt that is mass produced and mass marketed doesn't make you a rebel. It makes you just as much of a lemming as anyone else. My personal favorite is the kid who wears the shirt that says "You laugh because I'm different. I laugh because you are all the same." while wearing a shirt that is produced and sold by the thousands.

Most people of Maxim reading age realize that music acts like Avril and Good Charlotte are not really punk or alternative. They are created by record companines to look like they do, that it is all just an image. Younger kids and morons don't necessarily understand, which is exactly what record companies are banking on.

Posted by The 7th Angel at September 21, 2004 1:04 PM

reminds me of a classic, Julie Grendall/Wayne Newton in 'Adventures of Ford Fairlane', "I know that kid has no talent, but now, I'm gonna ship him gold" (or was it platinum?)

Posted by Danny at September 21, 2004 2:25 PM

I guess since I grew up in the Madonna era, nothing is edgy or shocking to me anymore. I think Madonna covered all that for me at a young age. What is ridiculous is the current generation lowering themselves to that level for attention to make up for their lack of talent.

I took my 12 and 14 year old neices to see Britney Spears. The stadium was packed with girls the same age and younger. You can imagine the horror to see a male dancer simulating eating Britney out. Since she can't sing, I guess she thought that she would throw some oral in there to distract. If she had any real talent then she wouldn't have needed to go to that level.

Between that and the strippers 2 rows ahead of me wearing trucker hats that say "I heart Vagina"... I had a lot of explaining to do.

BTW, I love Nick's post. he is hilarious.

Posted by Cass at September 21, 2004 2:50 PM

I hate the "I heart" saying. Anyone who uses it should be shot.

Paul, thanks for the tshirt. Thanks especially for putting "slampig" on the package so my dad thinks I'm a slut. And I'll get you a picture later tonight. =)

Posted by Livia at September 21, 2004 3:09 PM

"Rebelling" against what? Let them speak out on Iraq or jobs or something like that. I ain't holding my breath.

Posted by Eddie at September 21, 2004 4:09 PM

I guess I won't be entering the PK wet t-shirt contest as I have not received a shirt....:(. Who the hell are we kidding, Livia's got that deal sealed with her beauties.

I guess I will have to show my breasts at imalsampig instead...

Posted by Cass at September 21, 2004 6:06 PM

I am surprised that AL could upset you.

Posted by nels at September 21, 2004 8:20 PM

There are seven pages of commentary on this post at Harmony Central. Above all, you will see the converation in my comments is 1000 times more engaging that in a typical Internet forum. For that I have always been grateful.

http://acapella.harmony-central.com/forums/showthread.php?s=fcbbbe30867b7b4df69fa9868cbbdd9a&threadid=736836&perpage=20&pagenumber=1

Posted by Paul Katcher at September 22, 2004 2:32 AM

I actually liked the Tight Jeans and the Fat Girl link. Of course, I just got back from Yogi's.

And what's with these Georgia sex offenders? Two for "sodomy"? An 18-year-old for child molestation? Doesn't anyone else want to know if these were really crimes, or b.s. convictions under oppressive and hypocritical laws?

Posted by Eddie at September 22, 2004 6:01 AM

Hey Paul -

Got the shirt yesterday...looks great...and even had a some chuckles over the accompanying note. Thanks for the shirt and for your site for daily reads...

Aaron in NashVegas

Posted by Aaron James at September 22, 2004 10:26 AM

Although I see why you don't like the "FUCK" belt buckle I can't agree with your point.

Although many of Avril's fans are young:

A) Their girls - Girls for the most part don't read Maxim

B) Their young as you stated - No good parent should be allowing their child to "read" a magazine like Maxim

So my thoughts are - The belt buckle is just plain stupid. Although I am a big (male) Avril fan I wasn't too happy with the way the spread was done.

Like you said. The middle finger, and the belt buckle simply do not impress.

But congrats to Avril on trying to carry two very diffrent images :rolls eyes:

Posted by Anthony at October 13, 2004 11:13 AM

in reference to 'even sex tapes are rebellious anymore'. ive love to see avril getting fucked in one. i can just imagine seeing her breasts bouncing about as she rides a guy. also other stuff like avril fucking herself with a dildo, sucking dick, taking a cock up her ass, and having a facial! id pay good money to see that

Posted by rex at October 17, 2004 8:33 AM

also i think the fuck belt buckle is probably just a testimate of how many guys have drilled their cocks inside her. come on she must be the most fucked girl on the planet!

id fuck her up her ass if i could and see my cum dripping out her ass

she should so pose nude, legs spread

Posted by rex at October 17, 2004 8:38 AM

Avril what's goin on.... the belt is not you and what.... is she goin girly girl... i hope she reads this..... THE OLD AVRIL ROCKS!!!!!!!!

Posted by Dunno my name at October 17, 2004 9:26 PM
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