Chances are many of you are thinking of spending $10.25 (that's the price at Loews Cinema on Broadway at 84 Street) this weekend to see Anchorman, starring Will Ferrell. I'm here to stop you.
Smoke if you wish. Drink if you must. Shoot heroin into your veins and try that asphyxiation/masturbation combo thing that leaves people dead every year, but don't waste your time with this movie. It's just not a good use of 90 minutes.
From what I gathered from mainstream reviews — metacritic.com has aggregated them all — Anchorman is one of those movies you'll enjoy if you submit to the fact that it's dumb humor. Fine. Dumb & Dumber is the movie by which all comedies should be measured anyway.
Wanting to leave almost no chance that I wouldn't enjoy this flick, I had five beers before entering the theater — along with a plate of chicken & ribs and a 6-1 AL lead in the All-Star Game, but that's another story. Dumb me down, Mr. Ferrell! I'm buzzed and easier than an Amsterdam hooker at this point.
Ten minutes into this crapfest I contemplated leaving for beer No. 6. It was that bad. If you've seen the great Ted Knight in The Mary Tyler Moore Show — hell, even Sam the Eagle from The Muppet Show — you've seen every funny aspect of this movie, which is basically Ron Burgundy's pomposity and naivety as a San Diego network's lead anchorman.
As for the rest of it — the supporting cast, the "story," the surprise cameos that are in every movie nowadays, the post-movie goof-up reel that was funny at the end of The Cannonball Run and is now a staple in every "wacky" comedy — I couldn't fathom how anyone would give this thing more than two stars out of four. A "wait till it's on cable" movie if ever there was one.
In Five Words or Less: Checked my watch 10 times.
Since I work in a TV newsroom, I'm required to see this movie. From people in the business, it's gotten pretty good reviews.
Posted by CJ at July 16, 2004 1:16 PM