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Monday, May 24, 2004

The Great NYCBP.com Booze Cruise Ticket Giveaway
It pays to have Yankees fans as friends. NYCBP.com emperor Kevin Fitzpatrick is allotting 10 tickets to his Thursday, May 27 Fleet Week Booze Cruise to be given away free to PK.com visitors.

Unfortunately, I can't make this one. I have a prior engagement to help my co-ed charity football team, Chico's Bail Bonds, win Best Drinking Team for Zog Sports. But, for those who can make the booze cruise, here's what it entails:

• The three-hour Manhattan tour aboard Marco Polo Cruises' Half Moon sets sail at 7 p.m. Get there early to avoid being left ashore and cursing your bad fortune, just like fans of the Sacramento Kings and Philadelphia Flyers.

• The bartenders are Carmit and Timmie. Among sexiest bartending teams in New York, this Israeli-Hungarian connection has the cachet of Lewis & Clark, Smith & Wesson, Jameson & Jeremy. Let's take a look at their fine work at last summer's booze cruise: Paul's Photos | Kevin's Photos

• The cruise features a cash bar, so you'll pay reasonable prices for drinks. But through Kevin's generous offer, you'll be skipping the $20 boarding fee. So you'll be touring Manhattan island — snapping great photos of downtown and getting a glimpse under Lady Liberty's skirt — for nothing. The Circle Line tourists wish they had it so good.

• Kevin says over 100 tickets have been sold, around 40 of which have been purchased by a bachelorette party being thrown for some chick from New Orleans. Bring the beads, I guess. (This is the part of the post where I curse god for not allowing me to be in two places at once.)

Complete details at NYCBP.com.

So, how do you score a free ticket or two? Just e-mail me at paul@paulkatcher.com with your full name and I'll hook you up. Meet Kevin at the dock and you'll be on the list of VIPs. How easy is that? All I want in return is to see your photos. And maybe you can pimp my site on the boat, too. Oh, and spread the Gospel of Steinbrenner after a few shots.

And Now I Need Your Help
Upon returning from a long weekend visiting friends in the sticks — driving to bars, cooking and washing dishes with my own hands, shopping in a Wal-Mart — I found more than 6,300 spam comments, from the same source selling Viagra and the like, that have all but ruined my individual entry archives. I've tried everything I know to stop them — banning IP addresses and URLs with MT-Blacklist, even disallowing comments altogether. It's not working, the comments are still being posted, and I view this spam attack as a crime against the work I've done since this site went to a blog format in December 2003.

Anyone have advice on how to clear this shit? I'm not talking 5 or 10 comments. That I've been dealing with for over a year. I'm talking 6,300. (Update: I was able to delete 1,000 comments at a time using MT-Blacklist. What a pain in the ass. I didn't deserve this.)

I would also like to pursue legal action. Anyone know a lawyer who specializes in Internet attacks? It's not so much that I have to retain the interactive value of mostly dormant archives, but we can't lose the medium to this unethical bullshit.

Monday Link Dump:

Syracuse Lacrosse Headed to 22nd Straight Final Four — I was in transit as Steve Vallone scored with just six seconds left to break a 7-7 tie with Georgetown. And the streak continues. In other lacrosse news, Princeton advanced to the national semis with an overtime victory over Maryland. The Tigers are an incredible 23-0 in NCAA play in games against teams not named Syracuse.

Art of eBay Selling — Clear, Precise, Entertaining — Another great Internet tool that's been diluted with scammers, but the good still greatly outweighs the bad.

Reunion Shows Bring Back Dallas, One Day at a Time — I guess this means Larry Hagman is still alive, huh? That I can handle. But a return to the small screen of Bonnie Franklin and women's lib comedy? Nooooooooo! Can someone send me a tape of the One Day at a Time reunion with everything but the Pat Harrington scenes spliced out? (Thanks, Art)

When I Grow Up, I Want to Wear a Bikini at Auto Shows — Fifth-grader Cindy Harris contributes this commentary to The Onion.

The Economics of Music: For the Artist, They're Very Ugly Indeed — BookOfJoe.com follows the money for a gold album that sells for $18.98. A five-member group would get $40,250 ... to divide amongst themselves.

Are British Chicks in NYC Looking for Sex With No Strings? — The New York Observer is on the scene: "'The standard way of meeting someone in England is you get drunk and meet them at a party and end up snogging them — and then you go on a date if you like them,' my new acquaintance Carolyn told me."

9/11 Victims' Families Heckle Giuliani at 9/11 Hearing — Sounds like these folks were frustrated by political processes. Certainly, he's not the guy to be most angry at for 9/11.

Lingerie Football League to Kick Off — Full contact? Good. Pay-per-view? Bad. Tell me how it goes.

Category: New York | Permalink | Post a Comment (12)


Comments: The Great NYCBP.com Booze Cruise Ticket Giveaway

Ouch, Paul. I heard that Sacramento Kings remark and it hurt. I'm still sopping up the tears over their loss.

Posted by Anna at May 24, 2004 8:09 AM

6300 sounds like a personal attack, not a random spamming. I'm glad you were able to use MT Blacklist to bulk delete. I'll be interested to hear what a good internet lawyer can tell you about going after these assholes.

I'm not sure if any current laws deal with comment spam; I think they deal with e-mail only, but I could be wrong.

It's vandalism, pure and simple, just as if it had been done on physical property, and it should be treated as such.

Posted by BHW at May 24, 2004 12:07 PM

I know it wasn't a personal attack because a quick check of these guys' IP address (216.79.8.162) on Google shows they've spammed sites before:

http://www.google.com/search?num=20&hl=en&lr=&ie=UTF-8&newwindow=1&safe=off&q=%22216.79.8.162%22

I sent a note to BellSouth.net, which is where the stuff originates from. What I want, though, is to go after the spammers in court.

Posted by Paul Katcher at May 24, 2004 12:12 PM

I knew there was a reason why I liked British women!

And I have a pretty good idea why they're not meeting any good men in NYC:

Because their idea of a good time is to get done up in 80's clothes and big hair; then hit the clubs where they have car-detailers from Jersey buy them $15 martinis.

So are they generally meeting uncultured, emasculated guidos who would never date them after "snogging" them in a drunk haze? You bet!

Posted by Ed at May 24, 2004 1:59 PM

I am busy this Thursday and can't make the Booze Cruise, but would recommend it to anybody out there, if only for the presence of Timmie. Trust me: that girl's got legs that would make the Pope throw an orphan down a flight of stairs.

Posted by Ken Goldstein at May 24, 2004 2:44 PM

UK women seeking NYC men to snog, and they feel the American men are prudish...WTF?!? Where the hell are these women going to drink that they can't find men to screw in NYC? As stated, the UK women do not want to "groom" themselves, and that is where the problem lies. What hot NYC man (or any man for that matter) wants stubbly legs and jungle bush regardless of his drunken state?

I do like the "drunken serial monogamy" definition, though.

Posted by Cass at May 24, 2004 5:37 PM

Cass - what the heck did the women of Europe do to you, anyway? A couple of weeks ago it was the French this week it's hairy British women...

Anyway, my experience with the Brits is that they are fastidious about personal grooming (yes, even their teeth - these days) and that, a few "Young Ones" style metal heads, punks and hippies, the women are meticulously groomed, hair and all. And there are a lot of plain British women over there but when a Brit is hot, she is HOT (Liz Hurley, Posh Spice, the girl I got lucky with in Liverpool, circa 1988 etc).

However, the term "snogged" should be banned. Only the Brits could come up with such a slimy, ugly word to describe something as great as making out.

Posted by henry at May 24, 2004 5:49 PM

I've never been there, but there's a place called The British Open on E. 59 Street.

http://www.baramerica.com/showcase/nyc/nyc_008.html

I wonder if snoggers hang out there.

Posted by Paul Katcher at May 24, 2004 5:57 PM

yep - i had blacklist installed and in a span of 7 hours over the weekend (whilst i slumbered)i had over 160 spam comments. effing fantastic.

Posted by erin at May 24, 2004 6:10 PM

Paul, our blog didn't get hit this weekend - but I did; almost 6,000 spam emails, all the generic Viag*ra crap that sometimes sneaks past my spam filter. I had over 450 in my email account, and over 5,000 in the SpamAssassin folder. It's beyond reasonable at this point; not that it ever was, but it's time for S.W.A.T. teams.

Posted by Linus at May 25, 2004 4:22 PM

Can you access your web site via ftp? You can easily ban addresses or blocks of addresses in a .htaccess file in the directory your blog is in.

The format is simple:

order allow,deny
allow from all
deny from 212.199.169.153
deny from 62.219.59.122
deny from 80.95.35
etc...

Note the 3rd line with only 3 numbers, it bans the entire block of addresses 80.95.35.0 to 80.95.35.255

As for clean up, it depends on the structure of the database but there should be a way to query it directly either from the command line or with a tool like phpMyAdmin (for MySQL) or similar. Search for a common string in the spam, and delete all the matching records.

There may be problems, however, if the database is structured in such a way that the number of comments or their ID numbers are kept in another table, such as the posts' table; that would cause errors when the program looks for deleted comments. The place to ask would be in the support forum for the blog software.

Posted by Pierre at May 26, 2004 2:31 PM

I am a well groomed British woman and I can't understand why you get the impression that UK women are so 'hot' for NYC men anyway. Certainly with the charisma of a fast food counter assistance and the depth of Britney Spears, I have no idea why you could possibly be under the impression that UK women find you attractive.

If we don't spend as much time grooming ourselves as our 'Sex And The City' counterparts, perhaps it's because we actually have lives over here and would rather just 'get out there' than worry about the re-growth of our pubic hair.

Maybe rather than just shagging any slimey, sleazy American dick prick that moved, we are a little more choosy than easy American women.

With attitudes like this, perhaps the Twin Towers deserved to be bombed.

Posted by Rach at May 24, 2005 7:42 AM
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