Home Contact New York News Photos 1 2 Reviews Sports Web Finds
Your Host
Site Tools
Categories
Archive
Greatest Hits
Photos
Interviews
Search



PaulKatcher.com
All of Web
Wednesday, February 18, 2004

The 2004 Yankees: Better Than Mr. Burns' Dream Team
One of my favorite Simpsons episodes is February 1992's "Homer at the Bat," in which Mr. Burns loaded his Springfield Nuclear Power Plant baseball team with major league ringers. The team was unbeatable, as Homer won the game by getting beaned in the head with the bases loaded, which is pretty hard to do without Pedro Martinez on the mound.

Here's how that dream team shapes up against the 2004 New York Yankees, coming to kick your ass at a stadium near you:

Catcher: Mike Scioscia vs. Jorge Posada — From 1989-91, Scioscia hit a total of 30 home runs, the same number hit last year by Posada, who has made four straight All-Star teams.
Advantage: Yankees

First Base: Don Mattingly vs. Jason Giambi — In his last two seasons before the episode, Mattingly hit a total of 14 home runs, 68 less than Giambi has hit in his two-year Yankee career.
Advantage: Yankees

Second Base: Steve Sax vs. Enrique Wilson — Sax, a five-time All-Star, hit .304 with 10 HRs and 31 SBs for the Yanks in 1991. Let's face it, though. I could play second base for the Yanks this year and they'd win 100+ games.
Advantage: Springfield

Third Base: Wade Boggs vs. Alex Rodriguez — Boggs hit 118 home runs in his 18-year career. A-Rod has hit 104 in the last two seasons.
Advantage: Yankees

Shortstop: Ozzie Smith vs. Derek Jeter — Wanna see me blow a gasket? Tell me Ozzie Smith contributed more to a team's success than Derek Jeter. Ozzie hit 28 homers in 19 seasons, had a .262 lifetime average and scored 79 runs per 162 games. Jeter is sixth among active players with a .317 lifetime average and has averaged 17 home runs and 124 runs scored per 162 games.
Advantage: Yankees

Left Field: Jose Canseco vs. Hideki Matsui — Jose hit 44 bombs in 1991, a huge number back then. Matsui slugged only .435 in his "rookie" season.
Advantage: Springfield

Center Field: Ken Griffey, Jr. vs. Kenny Lofton — Griffey had yet to establish himself as perhaps the game's best player, hitting only 60 home runs in his first three full seasons from 1989-91. But there was no question where he was headed.
Advantage: Springfield

Right Field: Darryl Strawberry vs. Gary Sheffield — Strawberry hit at least 26 homers in each of his first nine seasons, but he never came close to putting together a season of at least a .300 batting average with 30 HRs and 100 RBIs, something Sheffield has accomplished four of the last five years.
Advantage: Yankees

Pitcher: Roger Clemens vs. Mike Mussina — Roger was the best back then. His highest ERA from 1986-92 was 3.13.
Advantage: Springfield

Final score: Yankees 5, Springfield 4. Of course, if this was a real game, the score would have been 12-3 and the best closer in baseball history would have shut the door, and perhaps the game's MVP would have been DH Bernie Williams, who's only one injured-plagued year removed from hitting .333 with 102 RBIs. (Bernie hit at least .305 every year from 1995-2002, when he averaged 24 HRs and 102 RBIs.)

Category: Sports | Permalink | Post a Comment (25)


Comments: The 2004 Yankees: Better Than Mr. Burns' Dream Team

It's a shame your "best team money can buy" won't be able to beat my Phils in the World Series... providing those Yanks can get buy Martinez/Schilling. :-)

I'd take Thome over Giambi, Polanco over Wilson, Byrd over Lofton, Burrell over Matsui, Lieberthal over Posada, and my starters and relievers. But, of course, I'm biased :-)

Posted by CJ at February 18, 2004 3:44 AM

Genius stuff, Paul. Shoot me an email when you get a moment. And SHAVE THOSE SIDEBURNS!

Posted by Conch at February 18, 2004 10:32 AM

I really find it hard to believe that someone who seems to be a true baseball fan can actually be really proud of what Steinbrenner has done. I mean, its great that your favorite team is gonna be a powerhouse and all, but to put together a team through brute force of money? Does anyone else see this as a little out of hand? Baseball's salary "cap" is a joke. King George pays 10% of whatever he's over the cap in a luxury tax, but he rakes in 100 times that in ticket revenues before the all-star break. Man, baseball used to be the game of gods. I guess all that's left that would ruin it more would be for Billy Gates to buy the Mariners, or maybe the King of Saudi Arabia to field a team.

Bottom line: money should not be the biggest factor in sports, but I guess that's just a shitty pipedream.

Posted by Paul at February 18, 2004 10:34 AM

Hey Paul, Must be great to have all that "talent" on your favorite team. They kind of remind me of my favorite team the Angels. The 1982 California Angels had Reggie, Fred Lynn, Don Baylor, Rod Carew, Bobby Grich, Doug DeCinces, Bob Boone. A pretty formidible line-up, but they just didn't have any pitching

To win it all, you need pitching and like the '82 Angels, the '04 Yankess do not have the pitching. You will soon find out that Kevin Brown is done and most of the other starting picthing is untested. Anyway, good luck in the up coming season and we'll see you in the playoffs.

Posted by Steve at February 18, 2004 10:52 AM

People crack me up when they knock the Yanks' pitching. Is it the best staff in baseball? Maybe not. Is it in the top five? Probably. Top 10? Without question.

Now put our lineup in any other city with a top-tier pitching staff and see how excited they'd be for Opening Day. Sorry, but New Yorkers aren't running around moaning about having "only" a top-5 or so pitching staff right now. We're gearing up to win the pennant for the seventh time in nine years.

The Yanks got Brown. The Sox got Schilling. One's being hailed as a savior while the other is supposedly a broken-down jalopy. Guess which one made last year's All-Star team and had a better ERA? And if Vasquez had gone to the Sox, they'd be throwing welcoming parties.

Posted by Paul Katcher at February 18, 2004 11:07 AM

Don't forget about Lieber, a master pickup last year. The guy is nasty, and I hear he's recovered just fine from his surgery. If either he or Brown play the entire season without getting hurt, there's no team that's going to challenge the Yanks during the regular season.

And assuming Vazquez can put up with the pressure of NY, he'll be awesome.

My team, the Brewers, will have a payroll of $30 million, and still probably will lose money. If I'm not mistaken, the left side of the Yanks infield will make $3 million more than the entire Milwaukee squad. A-Rod and Jeter combine to make $33 million this year, right?

Posted by Joe DiGiovanni at February 18, 2004 1:24 PM

Hey, great idea to compare your Yankees to Burns' team. I found it very amusing. I got back from class and found it, which was funny, because I'd spent earlier today giving the rundown on my Twins. Crazy.

Posted by McGuire at February 18, 2004 3:11 PM

OK, and how has Brown done in the playoffs against the Yanks, Paul? Of course, in that "The Yankees are the Gods of Baseball (You know, the team that just lost to the Marlins in the World Series, and who lost their 2 best pitchers in Pettite and Clemens) crap, you neglect a couple of things."

1. The Sox have better pitching. Period. Let's see: Pedro, Schilling, Lowe, Wakefield vs. Mussina, Brown, Vazquez, and Jon freaking Lieber. Pitching wins titles, as evidenced by the Marlins (Josh Beckett, anyone?)

2. The Yanks still have to play 162 games like everyone else. During the season, it's possible that Bernie's body will finally break down, Giambi's tricky knee will cost him a couple of games, Kevin Brown will break down for the 12th time in the last 6 seasons, Kenny Lofton will single-handedly destroy the locker room, and A-Rod will do better than Jeter, and the press will jump all over that.

Look at this year's Lakers. Most had them winning 70 games, and breaking records along the way. Now, they probably won't win their division, and may lose in the first round of the playoffs. Oh, and too bad the Yanks didn't get Maddux. That probably would have pushed them over the top.

Posted by James at February 18, 2004 4:35 PM

Mr. Burns does remind me a lot of Sir George.....

I guess then Smithers must be Brian Cashman?

Posted by Ed at February 18, 2004 4:52 PM

The Yankees will finish about 10 games ahead of the Red Sox. Pedro is due for yet another injury, Manny is probably pissed off, and I figure that Mueller, Millar, and Ortiz will all have big dropoffs.

As for the Isotopes vs Bombers, I might give the nod to Strawberry over Sheffield, despite the raw numbers. 26 HR doesn't sound like much now, but it was good for 4th in the league back in 1984, and Strawberry finished in the top 7 in HR each of his first 9 seasons (Sheffield has had only five top-10 finishes). Straw also has more top RBI seasons, though Sheff is far ahead in average.

They're pretty close, and it might just be because of where and when I grew up, but I seem to remember Strawberry having more of an impact than Sheffield does now.

Posted by Ken Goldstein at February 18, 2004 5:00 PM

I can see making an argument for Strawberry. I always thought he benefited from a unique last name and adoring media, but he did have some great power-speed numbers for the era.

Last year Sheffield reached career highs (in a darn good career) in batting average, runs, hits, doubles, RBIs and total bases. In their careers, they both had four top-10 and two top-5 MVP finishes.

Posted by Paul Katcher at February 18, 2004 5:34 PM

People talk about Kevin Brown's fragility like Pedro Martinez is a bull or something and as if Curt Schilling was perfectly healthy last year. Yes, I have heard of Pedro and Lowe. The Sox lost all four games those guys started against the Yanks in the 2003 ALCS.

I know pitching wins championships. That's why Mariano was carried off the field after Game 7 of the ALCS.

I've said it before. The Sox have a great team. The Yankees probably have a better team. Yes, I know pitchers get hot in the postseason. Zito could get hot. Mussina could get hot. Schilling could get hot. Brown could get hot. I know these things.

Whatever happens, it should be as intense an AL season as there's ever been.

Posted by Paul Katcher at February 18, 2004 5:50 PM

I'm certainly not going to disagree that the Yankees have put together a hell of a team, offensively. I just can't see to ignoring defense the way they have. I would still be worried about the 'park effect' change on NL players, particularly Brown. Loved him in LA, but Dodger Stadium is really quite forgiving. Yankee Stadium is a cavern for the AL, but compared to Chavez Ravine, it's a whiffle ball park.

I think placing the Yankee staff in the Top Five is /awfully/ premature given the potential park effect, and that horrible IF defense. I'll go with Top 10 in a heartbeat, though.

Oh... and feel free to blow a gasket, Paul. I /do/ think Ozzie Smith had every bit as much to do with the Cards success as does Jeter with the Yankees. He was every bit the leader as Jeter- he just did it more in the field than at the plate. I'd have to call the Jeter-Smith matchup a push, were I doing the scoring.

For the same reason, I'd tip the Matsui-Canseco scale in the other direction. Matsui may not have been a prototypical outfielder with power, but his defensive skills were outstanding, and his OBA was nothing to sneeze at. He's just not yet another #4 hitter like most of the Yanks seem to be. He's more a contact #2 hitter.

My 2 cents, and worth every penny you paid for 'em.

Posted by Jeffly at February 18, 2004 6:34 PM

... oh hey ...

And how about that John Henry complaining NOW about the need for a salary cap in baseball? I'll be the first to agree with the principle, despite the not-Yankee-big-but-still-way-too-high payroll, but come on. It seems more than a little disingenuous for the man who was looking to land A-Rod (and his $25m/y contract) to call foul on salary only AFTER the Yankees land him.

Sour grapes much?

Posted by Jeffly at February 18, 2004 6:38 PM

Hey Paul... no wonder Sheff had a great year, turns out the folks at BALCO labs were helping out ;-)

Apparently, his name was the only player's name not redacted from a court document released to the media. It doesn't say anything illegal was sent to him, but he was apparently mailing things to BALCO. Hmmmm...

Posted by CJ at February 18, 2004 6:47 PM

I do agree with most of your points, because the AL is absolutely loaded. Anaheim, Boston, New York, Oakland, Toronto, and Baltimore have great lineups, and all but Baltimore have good rotations. I just wish my team wasn't in the weak AL Central, because a 4 team playoff with Boston, Oakland, New York, and Anaheim would be great. As for John Henry, he has no right whatsoever to call for a hard cap after what he has done. The only people with room to complain are teams like Florida and Oakland, but they win with what they get instead of whine about it.

Posted by James at February 18, 2004 8:46 PM

I am certainly not a Yankee fan, but John Henry is a complete ass. This guy has gotten every break conceivable since he became an owner in the league. The Marlins-Red Sox owner swap is the definition of shady (although ironically Henry is the only Marlin owner to never win the World Series). So now after getting one of the top 5 franchises in the game, he starts to whine because he didn't make a move that he easily could have. Whining is an endemic part of being associated with the Red Sox.

Posted by Double B at February 18, 2004 11:24 PM

As with anything else related to the Yankees this dream team is overrated and overpaid.

Posted by Lisa at February 19, 2004 10:42 AM

The Yankees win on the field and profit off of it. The players can't be overpaid too much.

As much as people like to laugh at the Yanks for losing the 2003 World Series, there are 30 teams who would've loved to have traded places with them. With baseball fever at an all-time high among Yanks fans, the team might draw four million in 2004 attendance. I believe the average ticket price is $30. So that's $120 million right there. Add in the millions of hot dogs, tens of millions of beers, hats and jerseys, plus TV revenue, share of gate when on the road as MLB's top attraction...

They spend a lot and make more. That's good business.

Posted by Paul Katcher at February 19, 2004 11:23 AM

Overpaid. In the end this Yankee team and this Yankee business is banking on the fact that they will win a world series and therefore profit...

Win the world series? What happens when they don't - AGAIN? As usual they will look slow, overrated and overpaid.

Anyhow, my gripe isn't with how they market their "business". In a city FULL of people willing to pay $50 for a 1/4 cup of beer and a hip marketing team who can paste a logo on trendy clothes, they are bound to profit. Genuis? No, it just proves, they aren't stupid.

My gripe is with this baseball team, how much they pay their players, and the end result of the their GAME..not how many cups of beer they sell.

I hate professional baseball anyhow. I have too many morals to tolerate it.

Posted by Lisa at February 19, 2004 12:11 PM

Your horse called; he said: "Get off me."

I'm Rick James, bitch.

Posted by Johnny FlopBoot at February 19, 2004 12:43 PM

At least the Yankees don't have Homer's Wonderbat.

Posted by Kevin Wilson at February 19, 2004 3:39 PM

You know, Mike Scioscia has won a World Series more recently than Posada has...

Posted by Stephen Silver at February 20, 2004 11:00 AM

"Wanna see me blow a gasket? Tell me Ozzie Smith contributed more to a team's success than Derek Jeter."

Who would POSSIBLY say that?

James (above) says pitching wins titles. Absolutely. But BoSockians are going to be mighty disappointed as they watch Schilling try to pitch every fifth day in Boston's frigid Aprils, Mays, and Septembers.

Posted by Tommy at February 24, 2004 5:44 PM

This is absurd. First of all, you only care about homeruns, completely disrespecting BOTH Don Mattingly and Wade Boggs. Those two guys had some of the best plate management skills in the last 50 years. In one year, Wade struck out looking only 6 times.

Ever heard of something called DEFENSE? Disrespecting Ozzie Smith is ridiculous - he SAVED more runs in a year than Jeter scores in one. And Jeter covers as much ground in short as a parapalegic in a wheelchair with burnt bearings. Posada is a good hitting catcher, but has a weak arm and does NOT call a strong game - his game calling is mediocre, at best, and costs probably 10+ runs a year relative to the best studied receivers.

Posted by Paul at September 2, 2004 3:35 PM
Post a comment
















Fark.com
- [Interesting] Crips and Bloods still keeping it real ... in New Zealand. Wait, what?

- [Amusing] Police searching for teeny tiny gang of horse thieves after 28-inch pony stolen from field (pic)

- [Photoshop] Photoshop these ancient columns

- [Asinine] From the Department of Redundancy Department: Texas issues a report declaring that Texas has too many reports. Bonus: Report is 668 pages long and took 18 months to compile

- [Hero] Woman on crutches rescued from rapist by five bystanders (With scary mugshot goodness)

Yahoo! News: Most Emailed
- `Miracle' Marine dies; badly burned in 2005 Iraq blast (AP)

- Fed OKs plan to rein in unfair, deceptive credit cards (AP)

- ARREST BUSH (Ted Rall)

- Border Patrol lets some illegals go — over and over again (AP)

- Expert sees peanut allergy solution within 5 years (Reuters)

Yahoo! News: Sports News
- Police: Colts' Harrison interviewed about Philly shooting (AP)

- AP source: Sampson to become Bucks assistant (AP)

- QB Perrilloux tossed off LSU football team (AP)

- Edwards signs contract extension with Roush Fenway Racing (AP)

- NBA suspends Wizards' Songaila for 1 game (AP)

Web Friends
News
Sports
New York City
Sex
Internet
Guitar
Powered by Movable Type 3.31.