(I love it when people get riled up when others don't subscribe with what works exactly right for them. As if we all have the same body chemistry, metabolism and reactions to various exercises. Duh.)

For me, the short story is this: eight pounds gone in three weeks. The only way to lose quicker than this is to be a member of the Oakland A's. Let it be known that I piled on calories, fat and carbs at the Cowboys-Giants Monday Nightmare right before starting, so I didn't exactly get off to a running start.

Here's How I Worked It: 20g of carbs per day for the first two weeks. No alcohol, no caffeine, lots of water, no more than three cups of salad per day, muti-vitamin daily. Also a healthy dose of Yankees victories. Lost three pounds per week doing that. Added 5g per day for week three, during which I lost two pounds. Now I am up to 30g per day.

Typical Breakfast: Always some kind of combo of eggs, cheese, bacon, sausage and onion. With three glasses of water. Easiest part of the day, by far.

Typical Lunch: Salad with vegetables and chicken, oil and red wine vinegar. Maybe chicken or salmon with sides of broccoli and green beans (sautéed with oil and garlic).

Typical Dinner: Hamburger, cheese and onion; steak and salad; lobster tails, garlic shrimp, sausage. Sometimes not even all together.

Exercise: 30 minutes cardio 4x/week. Stomach crunches. Gotta walk at least a couple of miles a day. Can't go back to weights till my hand is fully recovered from surgery, which may take a couple more months.

Alcohol: None for first two weeks. Unflavored liquors have zero carbs, and Michelob Ultra, which I found readily available and tasting somewhat like a sick dog's urine, has 2.6g. Booze slows the fat-burning process, but if you think I'm going the rest of my life sober, you probably think a sexual-harassing movie star could get elected governor of our largest state. Being prudent with the sauce has been the toughest part, by far.

Energy Level: Same as always, which is pretty high, save the one day-a-week nap that could come any time and renders me comatose. Like Atlanta Braves hitters!

Constipation: All systems go, sir.

Hunger: Cravings very rare between meals. I seem to get full sooner.

Eating Out: At crappy places with limited sides options — potatoes, cole slaw, onion rings — you end up giving back half the meal. At better places where they've actually heard of broccoli and spinach, you're golden. Gotta pay for steak, lobster and shrimp, obviously. Nachos are good for the wallet, not for your ass.

Gas: Way down, though that was never a problem (despite a smear campaign from friends who love to post unfounded rumors about me here).

So No Problems at All? Actually, my head was spinning from days 2-4. I was dizzy, stuffed up and basically felt like I was going to die. But talk about fun! Then my body settled in, and it's been smooth sailing.