People around the globe are grabbing boxes of Kleenex after hearing the great news coming out of Australia's Cancer Council Victoria, which has concluded that men who ejaculate frequently — whether through sex with another human being or with the assistance of a broadband connection and lotion — are less likely to suffer from prostate cancer.
It's a simple matter of regular pipe cleaning warding off the carcinogenic effect on the cells lining the prostatic ducts. Or, as I like to call it, a great excuse for a blow job.
This is all certainly good news for businesses in Las Vegas, home to annual porn conventions with a target audience of men who type in chat rooms with one hand. Not to mention the increased traffic to the state's licensed brothels. The economy is finally looking up.
Other News Links:
FOXSports.com Puts Writing Gig Up for Bid — A perennial second-rate outfit is taking cash in exchange for the privilege of "covering" NASCAR’s New England 300. That doesn't include going to the event. It entails watching it on TV and writing about it, like you could do for free on your own site.
Jose Canseco Street in Miami Could Get Name Change — They could always called it Steroid-Using Wife-Beating Boulevard.
My Life as a TV Executive — TIME's Joel Stein spends a week running the Trio network. His dream of airing reruns of The Chevy Chase Show falls short, but succeeds in getting My Mother the Car back on the tube.
Christina Ricci Living in Fear of House Plants — I bet she shakes like a leaf!
We're Not in the Mood — A Newsweek cover story says sex just isn’t what it used to be for married couples with kids and busy jobs.
I, too, share Ms. Ricci's fear of house plants after I once tried to use a fern during my prostate cancer avoidance routine. Them needles are sharper than they look! I wince every time I see one.
Posted by JC at July 17, 2003 10:48 AM