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Sunday, April 13, 2003

Women Like Anal Sex (And More From My E-Mail)
Awhile back I signed up with Answerology.com, where men can have their questions about dating, relationships and sex answered by anonymous women. Apparently (and you're really not gonna believe this) men aren't interested in the dating and relationships parts. Here's a piece of mail I got Saturday night...

From: SportyGirl63@answerology.com

Can I please save all of us some time and just answer all of the repetitive questions that seem to be getting asked?

- Not all women mind swallowing. Actually some of us really like it. Just don't make us feel bad if we don't want to. Unless you've swallowed semen, then you have no idea why some of us may not have a taste for it.

- Yes, we like anal sex ... as long as you're not too well endowed. Use a lubricant and have at it ... gently.

- No, we don't like it when you kiss us after going down on us. Do you like it when we kiss you after swallowing? It's sticky and slimy ... and not very hygienic. Wash your face before going to sleep.

- No, I'm not going to tell you what the hottest thing a guy can do to me in bed is. Figure it out for yourself ... or go on a fucking chat line and jack off if you're just looking for spank material.

- Yes, we like to just get laid as much as you do. Some women actually can separate sex from love. Get over your fears of commitment and just fuck her already.

You have hundreds of women willing to let you in on all of our moods, need for affection, communication differences, etc., yet you insist on focusing on what we like in bed. We like sex, too. That's all you need to know.

Now, please, show us how smart you guys are. Show us how you can be as analytical (and I swear, if I get one anal sex joke from that comment I'm going to hurl) as women. Show us that you think about more than sex!

I used to answer a lot of questions for women using the same service (formerly Guy Critical), and all my answers seemed to boil down to "Well, everyone's different..." so take those answers with a grain of salt, but at least we now know that SportyGirl63 has tasted semen and enjoys anal sex (gently).

And, almost as good, I got a response to a long-ago post when I questioned, "Does anyone make toilet paper to the stars?" Here was the reply...

From: sales@justtoiletpaper.com

You asked if anyone makes toilet paper to the stars. The answer is yes ... we do.

We have shipped our monogrammed bathroom tissue to a fair amount of famous people.A talk show host, a football player, a sports announcer, TV celebs, and even recently did a custom job for one of the TV shows with the Hostess's photo on it.

Thought we would let you know, thanks for asking such a great question.

Marc Polish, sales manager
justtoiletpaper.com

Incredible. Famous people are not even on the same plane as ham & eggers when they're in the john.

Category: PK.com News | Permalink | Post a Comment (11)


Comments: Women Like Anal Sex (And More From My E-Mail)

Sounds like Sportygirl63 was the wrong person to propose those questions to. She will take it up the ass (gently, of course) but she won't kiss a guy after he has gone down on her? Puhleez. What is the fucking logic to that? You would think that a woman who enjoys anal sex would not have any boundaries.

PK, you should have posted a board asking those questions to your legion of female fans. You know, a better way to get to know your groupies more intimately. So I will get it started,and answer the questions for you:

1) I swallow and enjoy it :)
2) No anal sex.
3) You are more than welcome to kiss me after having gone down on me ( I taste good). I will NOT make you kiss me after I have gone down on you.
4) The hottest thing a guy can do in bed is to be dominant.
5) Yes, I do like to get laid.

*bonus answer: If you are naked except for wearing Tiffany Sport-- I can assure you that you won't have any skin left on your penis after I am done with you :)

Posted by C at April 13, 2003 8:26 PM

I didn't ask those questions. I just got the mail she must've sent to everyone who sent in any question.

Posted by Paul Katcher at April 13, 2003 8:35 PM


Yeah, but I think the celebrity toilet paper with the hostess's face on it was for the host, the director and the producer...

Posted by Gary at April 13, 2003 9:37 PM

A man who isn't willing to kiss me after I swallow......isn't going to get head. If he thinks it's so gross, then why does he want or expect ME to give him head, much less swallow.

Of course, that's just my opinion.

As for the rest.....isn't that the sort of thing a man should find out in a more intimate setting?

Posted by lucy at April 13, 2003 9:42 PM

Dear Answerology:
Hi, I have a question I'd like to ask a woman about a particularly painful act that can sometimes become pleasant but I can't ask that woman directly for that particular act because I'm immature, I have no connection with my emotions and I don't know how to communicate other than to ask an anonymous question on a Web site accessed by millions worldwide. What should I do?
Signed,
Shy and Stiff

***
Dear Shy and Stiff,
Bend over. I'll explain later.
Answerology

Posted by Jeff at April 13, 2003 9:49 PM

I stopped answering questions from the girls because all of them fell into two categories:
1. Different people like different things
2. Why are you asking me about why your boyfriend does certain things?

But the idea of having questions answered anonymously is not entirely bad, because people can be more honest when their identity is hidden. If you asked a girl, "So, when you're out at 3 a.m., does that mean you're hoping to find a good fuck before last call?" she'll probably slap you or tell you no. If you ask the same girl the same question via e-mail, you'll get a different and probably more thoughtful and insightful answer.

Posted by Paul Katcher at April 13, 2003 10:02 PM

The kissing after going down/swallowing question is an age-old question, as is the anal sex for women question. Though she proposes to speak for all women, the chick who answered the FAQs is speaking only for herself, as is everyone else who's commented thus far.

People *are* different -- very different in their sexual preferences. To some, it might make perfect sense why you'd want someone else's dick in your ass, but not your own feminine juices in your mouth. [Ain't no taste buds in the ass, as far as I can tell.]

The best advice I can give is to just ask the person you're with. The only problem with that is that people differ in their willingness/ability to talk about what they want or don't want sexually. But if you're the type of person who likes to talk about it, you'll know pretty quickly if you're going to be sexually compatible with the person you're with.

Paul, if the girl slaps you for asking, you were probably better off for asking in the short run, once the sting subsides!

Posted by bhw at April 13, 2003 11:32 PM

There are truly a million different answers to all those questions because there are a million or more women who'll answer them....and they all have different preferences.

I won't bother to give my answers here because that's not the whole point of your post. Just remember....your answer "Different people like different things" is the best possible answer. If everyone were cookie cutters and liked the same things then there would never be any variety in sex and/or love making.

Posted by Da Goddess at April 14, 2003 1:37 AM

It's true, every girl is different, and no one woman should speak for all the other women. Personally, I believe I have a normal sex drive, and I love the taste of semen, just as long as he isn't ramming it down my throat! Sex should be done with respect. And I feel the same way about anal sex as well...that is to say I love the feeling of a penis in my anus, but only after my bf uses lots of lube and goes in slowly. I make him lick my butt anyway - that's awesome! Once again boys, us girls are just as dirty & horny as you are, but treat us like people and we'll be happy to jump you!

Posted by Sexy-jackie at February 2, 2006 12:44 AM


I am all about equality in the bedroom. So, if she swallows, I swallow (Women produce alot of vaginal fluid when they are aroused).

I have no problem with a woman not swallowing/kissing after oral/anal sex, but she better not then expect that from me.

Only do (or allow) things that you are prepared to do (or allow) in return, it prevents any subconcious feelings of anger/guilt at getting/not getting what you want.

If a woman lets me penetrate her anus, I had better be prepared to let her penetrate mine.

Fair is Fair afterall.

D

Posted by Destructomuncher at October 7, 2006 6:21 AM

My girl and I used to have great sex at the beginning of our relationship. We both are pretty young. All of the sudden she decided we should wait and not to have more sex until we married. She claimed to be really catholic now and she doesn't even want to talk about sex with me. She does not treat me as good as she used to before, and she is still going out to night clubs, smoking and driking like she used to before she became so "catholic". What do you girls think about her?
Thanks in advance.

Posted by homebrio at December 4, 2006 12:07 PM
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