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Monday, January 27, 2003

Someone Forgot to Tell Oakland This Wasn't Preseason
Well, it was a disappointing Super Bowl. The team I root for always loses. Except for the Giants' wins in 1986 and 1990, the team I have rooted for has won something like four of 20 times.

But I would've at least settled for a decent game, which we may have gotten if the Raiders had not been kidnapped before kickoff. This was like a sci-fi movie come true. Did Rich Gannon even play in the Super Bowl? Does this really count as a Super Bowl appearance for Tim Brown? Was that coach Bill Callahan on the sideline or did they grab a corporate exec out of the stands?

Ultimately, I am not all that saddened by the result, certainly not as much as the gay man pictured, who is drowning his sorrows in a pitcher of ice water. I'm most upset that football won't be back till September and that the main sporting event in February is the Daytona 500. Great, someone get me a tin of dip.

Other Super Bowl Thoughts:

  • All week long, I felt as if the Bucs were there to cement their place in history, and the Raiders were there because the NFL told them they had a game scheduled Sunday.
  • The Patriots ruined my favorite Super Bowl tradition, the pregame announcements of individual players. After everyone applauded New England's selfless act last year of being introduced as a team, both the Bucs and Raiders did the same. No more Michael Irvin kung-fu. No more steely-eyed quarterbacks looking as focused to a plan as astronauts. No more Ray Lewis prison dances or whatever the hell he did in January 2001.
  • Shania Twain: What a piece of ass. After reading her comeback interviews, though, I'm convinced she's from outer space and even more of a programmed pop brand than any boy group.
  • The Bud commercial with the real-life zebra reviewing a replay was a classic Super Bowl spot. A funny punchline in a commercial that had absolutely nothing to do with the product. And the retro-Michael Jordan one was good, too. Other than that, the commercials were less memorable than the game, and that was hard to do in this case.
  • The lack of disclosure about what happened to Raiders Pro Bowl center Barret Robbins was intriguing. This is the most-covered event in all of sports, and not one reporter could get a credible source to crack? Wow. My money is that he OD'ed and had something stuck up his ass that required surgery.
  • Category: Sports | Permalink | Post a Comment (9)


    Comments: Someone Forgot to Tell Oakland This Wasn't Preseason

    The Milwaukee Journal Sentinel says Robbins forgot to take medicine for his bipolar condition for two consecutive days. That's the most detail I've read on the matter.

    Posted by Joe DiGiovanni at January 27, 2003 10:53 AM

    There have been some bad games since I've started watching the Super Bowl (my earliest memory is winning a bet with my dad thanks to Scott Norwood), but never that many bad commercials. The Levi's "Bold" commercial with the buffaloes was an absolute waste of time.

    However, I did enjoy "Terry Tate: Office Linebacker."

    Posted by Ryan at January 27, 2003 11:06 AM

    But Gwen was hot dude!!! :)

    Posted by gnome-girl at January 27, 2003 12:01 PM

    yup... i heard the bipolar thing... hello LITHIUM!

    Posted by erin at January 27, 2003 1:47 PM

    i didn't watch the game, the little rebel that i am. but i have enjoyed reading about it all day...

    and whothehell is this Barret dude, and what is wrong with his ass? did shania twain get her hands on him?

    Posted by jen at January 27, 2003 3:05 PM

    The picture of a tough Raiders fan with the pitcher of water and a man caressing him draws no comments? I think I seriously missed a Beat This Caption opportunity. Well, I'll try one:

    "Don't drink too much of the hard stuff, Rodrigo. I don't want you to be unable to perform tonight when we violate each other."

    Posted by Paul Katcher at January 27, 2003 3:43 PM

    "the silver brings out the sparkle in your eyes, Paco... the black of your jersey makes me feel like doing naughty things...it also matches my thong. Let us go home so i can wear my Oakland Skeleton mask and nothing else. There is always next year, but tonight... tonight, my lover, we ride!"

    Posted by erin at January 27, 2003 4:49 PM

    poor lil fella..
    i think that was taken right after the half time show.
    or maybie he just ran outta pretzels.

    Posted by tracy at January 27, 2003 7:39 PM

    After setting records for Super Bowl futility, the Raiders' MVP quarterback makes a run for the border and opens a bar called "Senor Ricardo Gannon's Mexifuckups"

    Posted by Ryan at January 27, 2003 9:29 PM
    Post a comment
















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