I look at the next few weeks as a kind of homework period. I'm going to have to sift through all the expected attendees' blogs to weed out the dorks who post about cats, family birthday parties and their sudden realization that being an assistant manager at a Gap is one of those positions in life that Hollywood writes sitcoms around.

And then, of course, I have to determine which blogs are written by single women. Which means I have to actually read what single women have to say. Which means I might kill myself by Feb. 7.

The whole idea seems like legalized stalking. I can comb through posts so old that the ladies won't even remember writing them. And then I can spring Something About Mary-like comments about how I, too, love a blend of hazel nut and vanilla coffee and it just happens to be in my kitchen ... which is a mere 10 feet from my bedroom and a lot of lotion.

Anyway, I plan to go to the party. Any PK.com visitors out there planning to attend? Let me know and let's have some laughs.

(On a complete tangent, I just fired up one of those Lean Hot Pockets, reminding me of one of the best lines I ever heard from a standup comedian: "They should put a warning label on Hot Pockets that reads, "WARNING: You are about to buy Hot Pockets."

Other New York Links:

• Priciest Burger in NYC Debuts at $41 — Now appearing at the Old Homestead restaurant: the biggest suckers not found in Times Square.

• NY Post's 200th Anniversary Photo Exhibit — Some of them aren't even of Jacko, who hasn't gone more than three days since 1993 without being on the cover of the Post.

• Howard Beach: Has Anything Changed? — Newsday's Dennis Duggan (no relation to Hacksaw Jim) reflects on the 15th anniversary of a local crime that made national news because of its racial implications.